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Moo-ving At My Own Pace Unisex T-Shirt

Moo-ving At My Own Pace Unisex T-Shirt

Color: Watermelon
Size
$34.95
$49.95 $34.95
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Shipping calculated at checkout.

🐔 Buy 2, save 10% automatically. Mix and match any shirts.
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🐄 I'm Moo-ving At My Own Pace. And It's Perfect.

The cow doesn't rush. The cow doesn't care that you're behind schedule. The cow has been doing this for a while and the cow is going to keep doing this regardless of what anyone else thinks.

Maybe there's something to that.

This shirt is for the slow-and-steady types, the people who refuse to hurry, the ones who decided early that "doing it your way" is the only way worth doing it.

For homesteaders, farm folks, cattle people, garden mamas, and anyone whose pace is their own.

Premium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Designed in the USA.

Member since it got out of hand. 🐔

Product Details

  • 100% ring-spun cotton
  • Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
  • Garment-dyed for that lived-in feel
  • Relaxed unisex fit, runs true to size
  • Twill-taped neck and shoulders for durability

Washing: Cold water, inside out, tumble dry low or hang dry.

Shipping & Returns: Free shipping over $85. Ships within 5-7 business days. See our refund policy.

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YEAH, WE'RE A CHICKEN BRAND. WITH STANDARDS. SEE WHAT WE MEAN BELOW.

What you're actually getting

Soft, durable cotton tees that get better with every wash. Not another scratchy polyester blend that dies before molting season.

Questions about our society?

Where are you located?

The Chicken Math Society is a US-based company. We print our shirts right here in the USA, like every chicken-loving small business should.

Will I get a tracking number for my order?

Yes — once your order ships, you'll get a tracking email so you can follow your package on its way to the coop. Track it obsessively or forget about it completely. Both are valid.

What size would fit me best?

We know sizing can be tricky, especially in a unisex tee. Every product page has a size chart — and if you're still unsure, just email us at chickenmathsociety@gmail.com. Real humans, real answers.

What materials are your products made of?

Premium 100% ring-spun garment-dyed cotton (Comfort Colors®). Soft from day one, softer after every wash, built to outlast your next coop expansion.

Do you actually keep chickens?

Yes. Too many. We're aware.

What if I'm not a chicken keeper but I think this is funny?

Honorary membership granted upon checkout. We don't gatekeep.

Do you offer wholesale or bulk discounts?

For coop tours, chicken Facebook groups, or your fellow members — yes. Email us at chickenmathsociety@gmail.com.

Why is your free shipping threshold $85 instead of $50?

Because shipping isn't free for us either. $85 covers two tees and gets your gift-buying done in one shot.

What's "chicken math"?

The inexplicable phenomenon by which a backyard chicken keeper begins with three hens and ends the season with seventeen, two ducks, and a coop addition. We named the brand after it.

Comfort for the slow-and-steady

Whether you're collecting eggs at sunrise or watching the flock at sunset, our tees are designed for chicken people who value quality, comfort, and a little dry humor. Join The Chicken Math Society and wear something that fits the life you've actually built.

Customer service that doesn't ghost

Got a question or need help? Real humans are here to make sure you have the best experience — like a trusted coop neighbor who actually picks up the phone.