{"product_id":"the-rooster-runs-this-place-unisex-t-shirt","title":"The Rooster Runs This Place Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐓 \u003cstrong\u003eThe Rooster Runs This Place.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou can tell yourself you do. You can put your name on the deed, pay the property taxes, decide where the new garden bed goes. But the rooster knows. The rooster has always known. And the rooster has been running things since the day he showed up, and he is not interested in your opinions on the matter.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eHe decides when the day starts. He decides who gets to be near the hens. He decides whether you're being approached with respect or whether you've been a little too casual coming out of the coop lately. The schedule is his. The rules are his. You are, at best, a tolerated guest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the chicken keepers and homesteaders who've made peace with the chain of command. The rooster runs this place. Everyone else just lives here.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage illustration printed in the USA. The kind of shirt that earns a knowing laugh from anyone whose rooster has also reminded them, regularly, who's in charge.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eMember since it got out of hand.\u003c\/em\u003e 🐔\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e100% ring-spun cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²) — heavyweight, structured\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eGarment-dyed for that lived-in feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eRelaxed unisex fit, runs true to size\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwill-taped neck and shoulders for durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eDouble-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eBlank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWashing Instructions: How to Not Ruin Your New Favorite Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCold water only (he'd approve if you asked)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTurn inside out before washing (the rooster deserves protection)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eUse a gentle detergent — this garment-dyed cotton is easygoing, keep it that way\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFirst wash may bleed a little, so separate it from anything precious\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry (hang drying = not provoking him)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping \u0026amp; Returns\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eOrders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Chambray \/ S","offer_id":51243197497650,"sku":"6480909_17648","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ M","offer_id":51243197530418,"sku":"6480909_17649","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ L","offer_id":51243197563186,"sku":"6480909_17650","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ XL","offer_id":51243197595954,"sku":"6480909_17651","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ 2XL","offer_id":51243197628722,"sku":"6480909_17652","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ 3XL","offer_id":51243197661490,"sku":"6480909_17653","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ S","offer_id":51243196711218,"sku":"6480909_15191","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ M","offer_id":51243196743986,"sku":"6480909_15192","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ L","offer_id":51243196776754,"sku":"6480909_15193","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ XL","offer_id":51243196809522,"sku":"6480909_15194","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 2XL","offer_id":51243196842290,"sku":"6480909_15195","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 3XL","offer_id":51243196875058,"sku":"6480909_16334","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ S","offer_id":51243196907826,"sku":"6480909_21506","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ M","offer_id":51243196940594,"sku":"6480909_21507","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ L","offer_id":51243196973362,"sku":"6480909_21508","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ XL","offer_id":51243197006130,"sku":"6480909_21509","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 2XL","offer_id":51243197038898,"sku":"6480909_21510","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 3XL","offer_id":51243197071666,"sku":"6480909_21511","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ S","offer_id":51243197104434,"sku":"6480909_16541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ M","offer_id":51243197137202,"sku":"6480909_16542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ L","offer_id":51243197169970,"sku":"6480909_16543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ XL","offer_id":51243197202738,"sku":"6480909_16544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 2XL","offer_id":51243197235506,"sku":"6480909_16545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 3XL","offer_id":51243197268274,"sku":"6480909_16546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51243197301042,"sku":"6480909_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51243197333810,"sku":"6480909_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51243197366578,"sku":"6480909_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51243197399346,"sku":"6480909_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51243197432114,"sku":"6480909_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51243197464882,"sku":"6480909_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Chambray_71ce75e4-2ef7-4bb7-bb01-2dbd6e8b4a15.png?v=1780357077","url":"https:\/\/chickenmathsociety.com\/products\/the-rooster-runs-this-place-unisex-t-shirt","provider":"Chicken Math Society","version":"1.0","type":"link"}