{"product_id":"spiders-vs-chickens-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Spiders vs Chickens Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐔 \u003cstrong\u003eLosing a Chicken: Devastating.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eBefore chickens, you were afraid of spiders. After chickens, you'll catch a wolf spider in a Mason jar at midnight to relocate her so she doesn't scare the hens. Before chickens, snakes were a hard no. After chickens, you'll find yourself outside in a robe with a shovel because \u003cem\u003e\"there's something in the run.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou'll fight off hawks. Stand off raccoons. Bury one and ugly-cry in the garden over a hen you named after your grandmother.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the chicken keepers who know — the things that used to terrify us became Tuesday, and the things that never used to faze us became unbearable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFor chicken keepers, homesteaders, farm folks, garden people, and anyone who's ever held a still-warm hen and asked the universe why.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Bold heritage typography printed in the USA. The kind of shirt that other chicken keepers will spot across a feed store and nod at, because they get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eMember since it got out of hand.\u003c\/em\u003e 🐔\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e100% ring-spun cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²) — heavyweight, structured\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eGarment-dyed for that lived-in feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eRelaxed unisex fit, runs true to size\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwill-taped neck and shoulders for durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eDouble-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eBlank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWashing Instructions: How to Not Ruin Your New Favorite Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCold water only (hot water is for people who count their hens correctly)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTurn inside out before washing (the graphic deserves protection)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eUse a gentle detergent — this garment-dyed cotton is easygoing, keep it that way\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFirst wash might bleed a little, so separate it from anything precious\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry (hang drying = more time with the flock)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping \u0026amp; Returns\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFree shipping on orders over $85. Orders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Blossom \/ S","offer_id":51121199218994,"sku":"3274689_16541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ M","offer_id":51121199251762,"sku":"3274689_16542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ L","offer_id":51121199284530,"sku":"3274689_16543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ XL","offer_id":51121199317298,"sku":"3274689_16544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 2XL","offer_id":51121199350066,"sku":"3274689_16545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 3XL","offer_id":51121199382834,"sku":"3274689_16546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ S","offer_id":51121199022386,"sku":"3274689_15176","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ M","offer_id":51121199055154,"sku":"3274689_15177","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ L","offer_id":51121199087922,"sku":"3274689_15178","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ XL","offer_id":51121199120690,"sku":"3274689_15179","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":51121199153458,"sku":"3274689_15180","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 3XL","offer_id":51121199186226,"sku":"3274689_16330","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51121199415602,"sku":"3274689_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51121199448370,"sku":"3274689_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51121199481138,"sku":"3274689_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51121199513906,"sku":"3274689_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51121199546674,"sku":"3274689_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51121199579442,"sku":"3274689_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ S","offer_id":51121199612210,"sku":"3274689_17648","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ M","offer_id":51121199644978,"sku":"3274689_17649","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ L","offer_id":51121199677746,"sku":"3274689_17650","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ XL","offer_id":51121199710514,"sku":"3274689_17651","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ 2XL","offer_id":51121199743282,"sku":"3274689_17652","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ 3XL","offer_id":51121199776050,"sku":"3274689_17653","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":51121199808818,"sku":"3274689_16523","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":51121199841586,"sku":"3274689_16524","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":51121199874354,"sku":"3274689_16525","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":51121199907122,"sku":"3274689_16526","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":51121199939890,"sku":"3274689_16527","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":51121199972658,"sku":"3274689_16528","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Grey.png?v=1777754148","url":"https:\/\/chickenmathsociety.com\/products\/spiders-vs-chickens-unisex-t-shirt","provider":"Chicken Math Society","version":"1.0","type":"link"}