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They carry the spray. They make the noise. They review the protocols.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eAnd some of us know that if it comes down to it, the bear's going to win. We've made peace with this. We hike anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the realists — the hikers, hunters, backpackers, trail runners, and outdoor folks who understand that being in the woods means accepting the food chain. The ones who'd rather see the bear than spend their lives not seeing the bear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFor hikers, hunters, fishermen, campers, backcountry folks, and anyone who's spent enough time in the woods to know who's actually in charge out there.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Distressed vintage design printed in the USA. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51158903882034,"sku":"1707539_15114","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51158903914802,"sku":"1707539_15115","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51158903947570,"sku":"1707539_15116","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51158903980338,"sku":"1707539_15117","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51158904013106,"sku":"1707539_15118","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51158904045874,"sku":"1707539_16326","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ S","offer_id":51158904078642,"sku":"1707539_21264","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ M","offer_id":51158904111410,"sku":"1707539_21265","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ L","offer_id":51158904144178,"sku":"1707539_21266","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ XL","offer_id":51158904176946,"sku":"1707539_21267","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 2XL","offer_id":51158904209714,"sku":"1707539_21268","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 3XL","offer_id":51158904242482,"sku":"1707539_21269","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ S","offer_id":51158904275250,"sku":"1707539_21562","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ M","offer_id":51158904308018,"sku":"1707539_21563","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ L","offer_id":51158904340786,"sku":"1707539_21564","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ XL","offer_id":51158904373554,"sku":"1707539_21565","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 2XL","offer_id":51158904406322,"sku":"1707539_21566","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 3XL","offer_id":51158904439090,"sku":"1707539_21567","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ S","offer_id":51158904471858,"sku":"1707539_21534","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ M","offer_id":51158904504626,"sku":"1707539_21535","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ L","offer_id":51158904537394,"sku":"1707539_21536","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ XL","offer_id":51158904570162,"sku":"1707539_21537","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ 2XL","offer_id":51158904602930,"sku":"1707539_21538","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ 3XL","offer_id":51158904635698,"sku":"1707539_21539","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51158904668466,"sku":"1707539_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51158904701234,"sku":"1707539_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51158904734002,"sku":"1707539_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51158904766770,"sku":"1707539_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51158904799538,"sku":"1707539_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51158904832306,"sku":"1707539_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Black_ba7b4b7a-b372-45ea-a14f-f722672021d9.png?v=1778793658"},{"product_id":"quietly-judging-you-since-you-pulled-up-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Quietly Judging You Since You Pulled Up Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🪑 \u003cstrong\u003eI've Been Quietly Judging You Since You Pulled Up.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThe porch sees everything. 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Orders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51167852724530,"sku":"8911199_15114","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51167852757298,"sku":"8911199_15115","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51167852790066,"sku":"8911199_15116","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51167852822834,"sku":"8911199_15117","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167852855602,"sku":"8911199_15118","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167852888370,"sku":"8911199_16326","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ S","offer_id":51167852921138,"sku":"8911199_21264","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ M","offer_id":51167852953906,"sku":"8911199_21265","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ L","offer_id":51167852986674,"sku":"8911199_21266","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ XL","offer_id":51167853019442,"sku":"8911199_21267","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167853052210,"sku":"8911199_21268","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167853084978,"sku":"8911199_21269","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ S","offer_id":51167853117746,"sku":"8911199_21562","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ M","offer_id":51167853150514,"sku":"8911199_21563","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ L","offer_id":51167853183282,"sku":"8911199_21564","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ XL","offer_id":51167853216050,"sku":"8911199_21565","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167853248818,"sku":"8911199_21566","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167853281586,"sku":"8911199_21567","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ S","offer_id":51167853314354,"sku":"8911199_17693","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ M","offer_id":51167853347122,"sku":"8911199_17694","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ L","offer_id":51167853379890,"sku":"8911199_17695","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ XL","offer_id":51167853412658,"sku":"8911199_17696","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167853445426,"sku":"8911199_17697","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167853478194,"sku":"8911199_17698","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ S","offer_id":51167853510962,"sku":"8911199_21243","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ M","offer_id":51167853543730,"sku":"8911199_21244","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ L","offer_id":51167853576498,"sku":"8911199_21245","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ XL","offer_id":51167853609266,"sku":"8911199_21246","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167853642034,"sku":"8911199_21247","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167853674802,"sku":"8911199_21248","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Black_7130673d-c7a3-4d45-95a5-3f40763a8265.png?v=1779141587"},{"product_id":"resting-beak-face-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Resting Beak Face Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐔 \u003cstrong\u003eI Don't Have a Resting Beak Face. This Is Just My Face.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePeople are always asking the hen if she's okay. If she's mad. If something's wrong. And the hen would like everyone to know: nothing is wrong. This is simply the face she was issued. She did not pick it. She cannot change it. She is, in fact, having a perfectly fine day.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eSome people get the same treatment. \"You look upset.\" \"Smile!\" \"Everything alright?\" No. Nothing's the matter. This is just the face. It came this way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the misunderstood-looking among us — homesteaders, country folks, chicken keepers, and anyone who's tired of explaining that their neutral expression is not, in fact, a personal attack on the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage illustration printed in the USA. 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Orders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51167941656882,"sku":"2843356_15114","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51167941689650,"sku":"2843356_15115","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51167941722418,"sku":"2843356_15116","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51167941755186,"sku":"2843356_15117","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167941787954,"sku":"2843356_15118","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167941820722,"sku":"2843356_16326","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ S","offer_id":51167941853490,"sku":"2843356_21541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ M","offer_id":51167941886258,"sku":"2843356_21542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ L","offer_id":51167941919026,"sku":"2843356_21543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ XL","offer_id":51167941951794,"sku":"2843356_21544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167941984562,"sku":"2843356_21545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167942017330,"sku":"2843356_21546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":51167942050098,"sku":"2843356_15156","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":51167942082866,"sku":"2843356_15157","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":51167942115634,"sku":"2843356_15158","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":51167942148402,"sku":"2843356_15159","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167942181170,"sku":"2843356_15160","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167942213938,"sku":"2843356_16325","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ S","offer_id":51167942246706,"sku":"2843356_21243","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ M","offer_id":51167942279474,"sku":"2843356_21244","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ L","offer_id":51167942312242,"sku":"2843356_21245","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ XL","offer_id":51167942345010,"sku":"2843356_21246","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167942377778,"sku":"2843356_21247","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167942410546,"sku":"2843356_21248","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ S","offer_id":51167942443314,"sku":"2843356_15191","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ M","offer_id":51167942476082,"sku":"2843356_15192","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ L","offer_id":51167942508850,"sku":"2843356_15193","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ XL","offer_id":51167942541618,"sku":"2843356_15194","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167942574386,"sku":"2843356_15195","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167942607154,"sku":"2843356_16334","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Black_d3a0ad85-8242-4c54-acb5-ea719b7807a3.png?v=1779142955"},{"product_id":"feral-but-fed-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Feral But Fed Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🦝 \u003cstrong\u003eFeral But Fed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThe raccoon is not thriving, exactly. But he's not \u003cem\u003enot\u003c\/em\u003e thriving either. He found dinner. The moon is out. The trash can, against all odds, was unsecured. By his own standards, this is a win — and his standards, frankly, are the only ones that matter to him.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThat's the whole philosophy. You don't have to have it all together. You just have to be fed, more or less upright, and getting by. Feral is not a failure state. Feral is just a lifestyle with fewer rules.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the gloriously unbothered — homesteaders, country folks, night owls, and anyone who has made peace with being a little bit of a goblin as long as the snacks situation is handled.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage illustration printed in the USA. The kind of shirt that earns a knowing nod from someone who's also feral but, crucially, fed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eMember since it got out of hand.\u003c\/em\u003e 🐔\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e100% ring-spun cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²) — heavyweight, structured\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eGarment-dyed for that lived-in feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eRelaxed unisex fit, runs true to size\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwill-taped neck and shoulders for durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eDouble-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eBlank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWashing Instructions: How to Not Ruin Your New Favorite Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCold water only (the raccoon would use hot water out of pure spite, so don't)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTurn inside out before washing (the graphic deserves protection)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eUse a gentle detergent — this garment-dyed cotton is easygoing, keep it that way\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFirst wash may bleed a little, so separate it from anything precious\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry (hang drying = more time being feral)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping \u0026amp; Returns\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFree shipping on orders over $85. Orders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51167983993138,"sku":"2482594_15114","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51167984025906,"sku":"2482594_15115","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51167984058674,"sku":"2482594_15116","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51167984091442,"sku":"2482594_15117","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167984124210,"sku":"2482594_15118","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167984156978,"sku":"2482594_16326","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ S","offer_id":51167984189746,"sku":"2482594_21264","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ M","offer_id":51167984222514,"sku":"2482594_21265","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ L","offer_id":51167984255282,"sku":"2482594_21266","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ XL","offer_id":51167984288050,"sku":"2482594_21267","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167984320818,"sku":"2482594_21268","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167984353586,"sku":"2482594_21269","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ S","offer_id":51167984386354,"sku":"2482594_21541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ M","offer_id":51167984419122,"sku":"2482594_21542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ L","offer_id":51167984451890,"sku":"2482594_21543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ XL","offer_id":51167984484658,"sku":"2482594_21544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167984517426,"sku":"2482594_21545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167984550194,"sku":"2482594_21546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ S","offer_id":51167984582962,"sku":"2482594_21243","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ M","offer_id":51167984615730,"sku":"2482594_21244","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ L","offer_id":51167984648498,"sku":"2482594_21245","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ XL","offer_id":51167984681266,"sku":"2482594_21246","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167984714034,"sku":"2482594_21247","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167984746802,"sku":"2482594_21248","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ S","offer_id":51167984779570,"sku":"2482594_17700","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ M","offer_id":51167984812338,"sku":"2482594_17701","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ L","offer_id":51167984845106,"sku":"2482594_17703","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ XL","offer_id":51167984877874,"sku":"2482594_17702","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 2XL","offer_id":51167984910642,"sku":"2482594_17704","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 3XL","offer_id":51167984943410,"sku":"2482594_17705","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Black_6a5a6117-5e69-4ab5-bafc-c63e01f81965.png?v=1779144289"},{"product_id":"havent-been-to-the-city-in-years-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Haven't Been to the City in Years Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e☕ \u003cstrong\u003eI Haven't Been to the City in Years. And I'm Fine.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThe exits aren't even on the GPS anymore. The traffic, the noise, the fluorescent lights of a parking garage at 5pm — none of it. Gone. Forgotten. Replaced by a rocking chair, a hot cup of coffee, and a yard full of birds who don't have any opinions about the stock market.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eAnd honestly? She's never been better.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThere's a particular kind of peace you only get when you stop trying to keep up with anything. When the morning is yours. When the loudest thing for miles is the rooster three properties over. When \"going into town\" is a once-a-week event you plan for like a small expedition.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the ones who chose the quiet on purpose — homesteaders, country folks, retirees, escapees, and anyone who's traded the noise for a porch and never once looked back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage illustration printed in the USA. 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Orders ship within 5-7 business days. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51217446142258,"sku":"7054598_15114","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51217446175026,"sku":"7054598_15115","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51217446207794,"sku":"7054598_15116","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51217446240562,"sku":"7054598_15117","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51217446273330,"sku":"7054598_15118","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51217446306098,"sku":"7054598_16326","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ S","offer_id":51217446338866,"sku":"7054598_21562","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ M","offer_id":51217446371634,"sku":"7054598_21563","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ L","offer_id":51217446404402,"sku":"7054598_21564","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ XL","offer_id":51217446437170,"sku":"7054598_21565","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 2XL","offer_id":51217446469938,"sku":"7054598_21566","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sage \/ 3XL","offer_id":51217446502706,"sku":"7054598_21567","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ S","offer_id":51217446535474,"sku":"7054598_21541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ M","offer_id":51217446568242,"sku":"7054598_21542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ L","offer_id":51217446601010,"sku":"7054598_21543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ XL","offer_id":51217446633778,"sku":"7054598_21544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 2XL","offer_id":51217446666546,"sku":"7054598_21545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 3XL","offer_id":51217446699314,"sku":"7054598_21546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ S","offer_id":51217446732082,"sku":"7054598_17700","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ M","offer_id":51217446764850,"sku":"7054598_17701","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ L","offer_id":51217446797618,"sku":"7054598_17703","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ XL","offer_id":51217446830386,"sku":"7054598_17702","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 2XL","offer_id":51217446863154,"sku":"7054598_17704","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 3XL","offer_id":51217446895922,"sku":"7054598_17705","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ S","offer_id":51217446928690,"sku":"7054598_15191","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ M","offer_id":51217446961458,"sku":"7054598_15192","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ L","offer_id":51217446994226,"sku":"7054598_15193","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ XL","offer_id":51217447026994,"sku":"7054598_15194","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 2XL","offer_id":51217447059762,"sku":"7054598_15195","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 3XL","offer_id":51217447092530,"sku":"7054598_16334","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Black_7dfe8cd7-7245-4b18-867b-1cc4367b90a3.png?v=1779825322"},{"product_id":"he-taught-me-everything-fathers-day-unisex-t-shirt","title":"He Taught Me Everything Father's Day Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🎣 \u003cstrong\u003eHe Didn't Teach Me How To Fish. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Khaki \/ S","offer_id":51227679195442,"sku":"5784751_21534","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ M","offer_id":51227679228210,"sku":"5784751_21535","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ L","offer_id":51227679260978,"sku":"5784751_21536","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ XL","offer_id":51227679293746,"sku":"5784751_21537","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ 2XL","offer_id":51227679326514,"sku":"5784751_21538","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ 3XL","offer_id":51227679359282,"sku":"5784751_21539","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ S","offer_id":51227679392050,"sku":"5784751_21506","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ M","offer_id":51227679424818,"sku":"5784751_21507","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ L","offer_id":51227679457586,"sku":"5784751_21508","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ XL","offer_id":51227679490354,"sku":"5784751_21509","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 2XL","offer_id":51227679523122,"sku":"5784751_21510","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 3XL","offer_id":51227679555890,"sku":"5784751_21511","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51227679588658,"sku":"5784751_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51227679621426,"sku":"5784751_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51227679654194,"sku":"5784751_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51227679686962,"sku":"5784751_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51227679719730,"sku":"5784751_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51227679752498,"sku":"5784751_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51227679785266,"sku":"5784751_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51227679818034,"sku":"5784751_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51227679850802,"sku":"5784751_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51227679883570,"sku":"5784751_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51227679916338,"sku":"5784751_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51227679949106,"sku":"5784751_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":51227679981874,"sku":"5784751_16523","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":51227680014642,"sku":"5784751_16524","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":51227680047410,"sku":"5784751_16525","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":51227680080178,"sku":"5784751_16526","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":51227680112946,"sku":"5784751_16527","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":51227680145714,"sku":"5784751_16528","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Khaki_6e00f3b1-3b05-40ea-a241-4f87a82ba040.png?v=1779994429"},{"product_id":"land-that-i-love-mostly-the-rural-part-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Land That I Love Mostly The Rural Part Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🚜 \u003cstrong\u003eLand That I Love. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Moss \/ S","offer_id":51249807819058,"sku":"3938733_17700","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ M","offer_id":51249807851826,"sku":"3938733_17701","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ L","offer_id":51249807884594,"sku":"3938733_17703","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ XL","offer_id":51249807917362,"sku":"3938733_17702","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 2XL","offer_id":51249807950130,"sku":"3938733_17704","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 3XL","offer_id":51249807982898,"sku":"3938733_17705","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ S","offer_id":51249808015666,"sku":"3938733_15191","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ M","offer_id":51249808048434,"sku":"3938733_15192","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ L","offer_id":51249808081202,"sku":"3938733_15193","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ XL","offer_id":51249808113970,"sku":"3938733_15194","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 2XL","offer_id":51249808146738,"sku":"3938733_15195","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 3XL","offer_id":51249808179506,"sku":"3938733_16334","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ S","offer_id":51249808212274,"sku":"3938733_16511","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ M","offer_id":51249808245042,"sku":"3938733_16512","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ L","offer_id":51249808277810,"sku":"3938733_16513","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ XL","offer_id":51249808310578,"sku":"3938733_16514","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ 2XL","offer_id":51249808343346,"sku":"3938733_16515","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blue Jean \/ 3XL","offer_id":51249808376114,"sku":"3938733_16516","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ S","offer_id":51249808408882,"sku":"3938733_17655","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ M","offer_id":51249808441650,"sku":"3938733_17656","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ L","offer_id":51249808474418,"sku":"3938733_17657","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ XL","offer_id":51249808507186,"sku":"3938733_17658","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 2XL","offer_id":51249808539954,"sku":"3938733_17659","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 3XL","offer_id":51249808572722,"sku":"3938733_17660","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51249808605490,"sku":"3938733_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51249808638258,"sku":"3938733_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51249808671026,"sku":"3938733_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51249808703794,"sku":"3938733_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51249808736562,"sku":"3938733_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51249808769330,"sku":"3938733_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Moss_a06bdca5-1c3a-4c79-b6f8-594edf76981d.png?v=1780445187"},{"product_id":"no-cell-service-no-problem-unisex-t-shirt","title":"No Cell Service No Problem Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🌲 \u003cstrong\u003eNo Cell Service. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Pepper \/ S","offer_id":51261648601394,"sku":"5076479_17693","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ M","offer_id":51261648634162,"sku":"5076479_17694","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ L","offer_id":51261648666930,"sku":"5076479_17695","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ XL","offer_id":51261648699698,"sku":"5076479_17696","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261648732466,"sku":"5076479_17697","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pepper \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261648765234,"sku":"5076479_17698","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ S","offer_id":51261648798002,"sku":"5076479_21243","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ M","offer_id":51261648830770,"sku":"5076479_21244","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ L","offer_id":51261648863538,"sku":"5076479_21245","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ XL","offer_id":51261648896306,"sku":"5076479_21246","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261648929074,"sku":"5076479_21247","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Espresso \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261648961842,"sku":"5076479_21248","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ S","offer_id":51261648994610,"sku":"5076479_21506","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ M","offer_id":51261649027378,"sku":"5076479_21507","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ L","offer_id":51261649060146,"sku":"5076479_21508","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ XL","offer_id":51261649092914,"sku":"5076479_21509","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261649125682,"sku":"5076479_21510","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Washed Denim \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261649158450,"sku":"5076479_21511","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51261649191218,"sku":"5076479_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51261649223986,"sku":"5076479_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51261649256754,"sku":"5076479_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51261649289522,"sku":"5076479_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261649322290,"sku":"5076479_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261649355058,"sku":"5076479_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":51261649387826,"sku":"5076479_16523","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":51261649420594,"sku":"5076479_16524","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":51261649453362,"sku":"5076479_16525","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":51261649486130,"sku":"5076479_16526","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261649518898,"sku":"5076479_16527","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261649551666,"sku":"5076479_16528","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Pepper_c3ee29eb-8ad5-44a3-8db3-cfa39081c60e.png?v=1780584787"},{"product_id":"id-rather-be-in-the-garden-unisex-t-shirt","title":"I'd Rather Be In The Garden Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🌻 \u003cstrong\u003eI'd Rather Be In The Garden.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eIt's not even a close call. Right now, in this moment, doing this thing — yes, fine, sure. But also: she'd rather be in the garden. The meeting could be the most riveting conversation of the year and she'd still be thinking about whether the tomatoes need staking and how the basil is coming along.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThe garden is where the actual living happens. Everything else is just the part she gets through to come back to it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the gardeners — the homesteaders, the vegetable lifers, the herb-and-flower obsessives whose first thought every morning is what needs water and whose last thought every night is what's ready to pick tomorrow. She'd rather be in the garden. She'd rather be in the garden right now, in fact. Excuse her.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage botanical design printed in the USA. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51261665378610,"sku":"3869194_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51261665411378,"sku":"3869194_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51261665444146,"sku":"3869194_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51261665476914,"sku":"3869194_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261665509682,"sku":"3869194_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261665542450,"sku":"3869194_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ S","offer_id":51261664788786,"sku":"3869194_17700","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ M","offer_id":51261664821554,"sku":"3869194_17701","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ L","offer_id":51261664854322,"sku":"3869194_17703","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ XL","offer_id":51261664887090,"sku":"3869194_17702","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261664919858,"sku":"3869194_17704","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261664952626,"sku":"3869194_17705","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51261664985394,"sku":"3869194_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51261665018162,"sku":"3869194_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51261665050930,"sku":"3869194_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51261665083698,"sku":"3869194_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261665116466,"sku":"3869194_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261665149234,"sku":"3869194_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ S","offer_id":51261665182002,"sku":"3869194_21513","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ M","offer_id":51261665214770,"sku":"3869194_21514","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ L","offer_id":51261665247538,"sku":"3869194_21515","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ XL","offer_id":51261665280306,"sku":"3869194_21516","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261665313074,"sku":"3869194_21517","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261665345842,"sku":"3869194_21518","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":51261665575218,"sku":"3869194_16523","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":51261665607986,"sku":"3869194_16524","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":51261665640754,"sku":"3869194_16525","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":51261665673522,"sku":"3869194_16526","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261665706290,"sku":"3869194_16527","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261665739058,"sku":"3869194_16528","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Moss_90508ac0-d2fd-4b9a-8cd5-f4179e1a2908.png?v=1780586279"},{"product_id":"good-with-horses-bad-with-people-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Good With Horses Bad With People Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐴 \u003cstrong\u003eGood With Horses. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Midnight \/ S","offer_id":51261678813490,"sku":"7213953_21541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ M","offer_id":51261678846258,"sku":"7213953_21542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ L","offer_id":51261678879026,"sku":"7213953_21543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ XL","offer_id":51261678911794,"sku":"7213953_21544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261678944562,"sku":"7213953_21545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Midnight \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261678977330,"sku":"7213953_21546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":51261679010098,"sku":"7213953_15156","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":51261679042866,"sku":"7213953_15157","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":51261679075634,"sku":"7213953_15158","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":51261679108402,"sku":"7213953_15159","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261679141170,"sku":"7213953_15160","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261679173938,"sku":"7213953_16325","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ S","offer_id":51261679206706,"sku":"7213953_17662","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ M","offer_id":51261679239474,"sku":"7213953_17663","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ L","offer_id":51261679272242,"sku":"7213953_17664","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ XL","offer_id":51261679305010,"sku":"7213953_17665","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261679337778,"sku":"7213953_17666","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261679370546,"sku":"7213953_17667","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51261679403314,"sku":"7213953_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51261679436082,"sku":"7213953_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51261679468850,"sku":"7213953_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51261679501618,"sku":"7213953_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261679534386,"sku":"7213953_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261679567154,"sku":"7213953_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ S","offer_id":51261679599922,"sku":"7213953_16541","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ M","offer_id":51261679632690,"sku":"7213953_16542","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ L","offer_id":51261679665458,"sku":"7213953_16543","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ XL","offer_id":51261679698226,"sku":"7213953_16544","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 2XL","offer_id":51261679730994,"sku":"7213953_16545","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 3XL","offer_id":51261679763762,"sku":"7213953_16546","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Midnight_5035b4fe-92fa-4e40-8635-12ef4ce36117.png?v=1780588198"},{"product_id":"ridin-shotgun-heeler-truck-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Ridin' Shotgun Heeler Truck Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐕 \u003cstrong\u003eRidin' Shotgun.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eHe doesn't ask where you're going. 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Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51262074257714,"sku":"4382723_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51262074290482,"sku":"4382723_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51262074323250,"sku":"4382723_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51262074356018,"sku":"4382723_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262074388786,"sku":"4382723_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262074421554,"sku":"4382723_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ S","offer_id":51262073667890,"sku":"4382723_15156","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ M","offer_id":51262073700658,"sku":"4382723_15157","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ L","offer_id":51262073733426,"sku":"4382723_15158","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ XL","offer_id":51262073766194,"sku":"4382723_15159","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262073798962,"sku":"4382723_15160","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Berry \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262073831730,"sku":"4382723_16325","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":51262073864498,"sku":"4382723_17707","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":51262073897266,"sku":"4382723_17708","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":51262073930034,"sku":"4382723_17709","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":51262073962802,"sku":"4382723_17710","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262073995570,"sku":"4382723_17711","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262074028338,"sku":"4382723_17712","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ S","offer_id":51262074061106,"sku":"4382723_21513","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ M","offer_id":51262074093874,"sku":"4382723_21514","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ L","offer_id":51262074126642,"sku":"4382723_21515","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ XL","offer_id":51262074159410,"sku":"4382723_21516","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262074192178,"sku":"4382723_21517","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262074224946,"sku":"4382723_21518","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":51262074454322,"sku":"4382723_16523","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":51262074487090,"sku":"4382723_16524","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":51262074519858,"sku":"4382723_16525","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":51262074552626,"sku":"4382723_16526","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262074585394,"sku":"4382723_16527","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262074618162,"sku":"4382723_16528","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Berry_208c21bd-4b7f-4e98-b50d-56f1c60c2445.png?v=1780596559"},{"product_id":"happy-as-a-pig-in-mud-unisex-t-shirt","title":"Happy As A Pig In Mud Unisex T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e🐖 \u003cstrong\u003e'Happy As A Pig In Mud.'\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eIt's an expression for a reason. Pigs, given a choice between any luxury this world has to offer and a really good mud puddle, will choose the mud every single time. They sink in. They settle. The eyes close. The day improves immediately. There's no overthinking it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\"Happy as a pig in mud\" describes a kind of joy most people don't access anymore — the simple, unembarrassed contentment of being exactly where you want to be. The pig knows something we forgot.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis shirt is for the ones who get it — country folks, homesteaders, and anyone who's also figured out that happiness usually shows up in the small, slightly muddy, deeply unglamorous moments. Happy as a pig in mud. That's the whole goal, honestly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003ePremium garment-dyed Comfort Colors cotton — soft from day one, softer with every wash. Heritage pig illustration printed in the USA. The kind of shirt that earns a knowing smile from anyone whose best days also involve dirt, water, and zero plans.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eMember since it got out of hand.\u003c\/em\u003e 🐔\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e100% ring-spun cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFabric weight: 6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²) — heavyweight, structured\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eGarment-dyed for that lived-in feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eRelaxed unisex fit, runs true to size\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003e7\/8″ double-needle topstitched collar\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTwill-taped neck and shoulders for durability\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eDouble-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eBlank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWashing Instructions: How to Not Ruin Your New Favorite Shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cul\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eCold water only (the pig has done enough dirty work for one wash)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTurn inside out before washing (the illustration deserves protection)\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eUse a gentle detergent — this garment-dyed cotton is easygoing, keep it that way\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eFirst wash may bleed a little, so separate it from anything precious\u003c\/li\u003e\n  \u003cli\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry (hang drying = back to the puddle sooner)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\n\u003chr\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eShipping \u0026amp; Returns\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eOrders ship within 5-7 business days. Made-to-order, so returns are accepted for defective or damaged items only — see our full \u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003erefund policy\u003c\/a\u003e for details.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Chicken Math Society","offers":[{"title":"Moss \/ S","offer_id":51262109745458,"sku":"7326578_17700","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ M","offer_id":51262109778226,"sku":"7326578_17701","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ L","offer_id":51262109810994,"sku":"7326578_17703","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ XL","offer_id":51262109843762,"sku":"7326578_17702","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262109876530,"sku":"7326578_17704","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Moss \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262109909298,"sku":"7326578_17705","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ S","offer_id":51262109942066,"sku":"7326578_15191","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ M","offer_id":51262109974834,"sku":"7326578_15192","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ L","offer_id":51262110007602,"sku":"7326578_15193","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ XL","offer_id":51262110040370,"sku":"7326578_15194","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262110073138,"sku":"7326578_15195","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Watermelon \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262110105906,"sku":"7326578_16334","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ S","offer_id":51262110138674,"sku":"7326578_17662","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ M","offer_id":51262110171442,"sku":"7326578_17663","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ L","offer_id":51262110204210,"sku":"7326578_17664","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ XL","offer_id":51262110236978,"sku":"7326578_17665","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262110269746,"sku":"7326578_17666","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Terracotta \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262110302514,"sku":"7326578_17667","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ S","offer_id":51262110335282,"sku":"7326578_21513","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ M","offer_id":51262110368050,"sku":"7326578_21514","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ L","offer_id":51262110400818,"sku":"7326578_21515","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ XL","offer_id":51262110433586,"sku":"7326578_21516","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262110466354,"sku":"7326578_21517","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chalky Mint \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262110499122,"sku":"7326578_21518","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ S","offer_id":51262110531890,"sku":"7326578_15166","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ M","offer_id":51262110564658,"sku":"7326578_15167","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ L","offer_id":51262110597426,"sku":"7326578_15168","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ XL","offer_id":51262110630194,"sku":"7326578_15169","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 2XL","offer_id":51262110662962,"sku":"7326578_15170","price":36.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butter \/ 3XL","offer_id":51262110695730,"sku":"7326578_16328","price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0980\/4388\/7922\/files\/Moss_e2812f25-3554-4c7c-ba1b-c8233c52db3e.png?v=1780597733"}],"url":"https:\/\/chickenmathsociety.com\/collections\/new-arrivals.oembed?page=2","provider":"Chicken Math Society","version":"1.0","type":"link"}